I was born in a village called
Surey (Jigmechholing after 1992), in Gelephu, Sarpang Bhutan to Laxmi Narayan
Kafley and Chhali Maya Kafley of Sandilya gotra, on 2nd August 1968.
The following facts about the family
that I have heard from my parents and other elderly relatives would be a good
source of knowledge about the ancestry for the generations to come.
My father is the fourth son out of
five sons of my grandparents. A cousin was also included in the family therefore;
there were two younger ones with two aunts, both elder to my father. This
consisted a family of eight siblings. The eldest aunt was married to Ghimire
from Batiyamari, Behali in north Assam and the younger one was married to
Chapagai from Soyang, Ilam in Nepal.
There had been a very horrifying
time for the Kafleys of Surey once. Three brothers (my uncles) (1st, 3rd and
5th) lost their lives during a pendamic that hit Surey in early 60s within a
span of few months. My second uncle, Mr. Chhabilal Kafley took up the challenge
of bringing up the entire family thereafter. He had to face many difficulties in doing so
for which we honour him with the highest appreciations. Later, when the family
members grew up, they got separated. The family of the eldest settled in lower
Surey with the eldest son Issorie Kafley, the family of third moved to upper Surey with the eldest
son Bhagawat Kafley. My father married a daughter of Rizal. From her was
my elder sister Tekala Dahal. Unfortunately, she could not survive the pandemic
and passed away leaving behind my sister Tekala Dahal in the lap of my
father. After the demise of my step mother my dad too had no any other options
than to reunite my uncle, Chhabilal. My father said to be someone very honest and
obedient. He was given the entire charge of the cowherd far away from the
village. My sister who was a little girl then, told me of the experience that she
had of the time she spent in the cowshed alone when my father was away to
monitor the cows and collect fodder for the calves in the forest.
Later, he decided to marry again.
So, with someone as companion from the village, he set out to the South West
looking for a suitable bride and arrived Sipsu. They visited the Bhandari
family after knowing that the family had a daughter to be married. My mother,
the youngest in the family had been at marriageable age. It was understood later that none around would
ask for her hand as she used to get epilepsy seizure since her childhood. My
father wasn't aware of all these and married and brought her to Surey.
The marriage ceremony concluded in a few days time without any grand preparations.
It was sometimes in 1966-67. It used to be a kind of formal marriage called
"Kumlay Bihay"(marriage just with a bag) that existed those
days. I can't imagine! Fortunately, there were no such attacks after her
marriage. However, a peculiar symptom reappeared in her later life. Medication was
started only later and it got controlled. She is around 70+ and still living a normal life but needs to take pills to prevent
from attack.
After I was born in 1968, my father
thought of settling down by himself. So, he purchased a piece of land from Mr.Acharja
with a traditional house in Thewar, presently known as Chaskhar, under
Chuzagang Gewog now which was called Danabari Block in Gelephu then. It is nearer to
Shemgang-Trongsa highway than to the Gewog centre, Danabari. This migration
took place sometimes in the beginning of 1969.
I don't remember my childhood days
but my neighbour Mrs Basnet (Kul Bdr's mother) still remembers it very clearly.
She says that I used to be kept in a kennel like structure to make sure that I
didn't move around as there was no one to look after me when I was a
child. I used to be kept like that because my parents and my elder sister had
to attend farm animals, collect fodder for animals, contribute and participate
in farming activities and also fetch water which was about 10
minutes walk from the house. Mrs
Basnet still talks about the innocence and quietness before I was taken out
of the kennel and my behaviour after I was out, on all messenger
conversations till date. However, I don't reminisce any of these
incidents.
I remember one of the incidences of those school days. One day, when I came back from school, I was served rice by my father with freshly boiled ghee, few spoons of self harvested honey, milk and rice. I enjoyed it. Later in the evening I got a kind of hallucinations where I carried the kerosene lamp and wanted to go out. When I think of it now it must have been because of the honey. I didn't realize it but blamed that warm fresh heated ghee. I didn't eat ghee for nearly ten to fifteen years thereafter. I didn't like the smell even but later, slowly, I developed liking in its taste.
The land between the Aie Bridge and the Thewar Khola (present Shershong area) used to be covered with dense forest. We used to have cows, numbering not less than fifty altogether. We used to set them free into that forest and sit on a rock just above the river bank, waiting for them to return in the evening and stop them there until all came back. I also remember taking the cows to the mountains and keeping them there for some days. I have memories of staying there in the cow shed during my vacations with Thapa Daju. Thapa Daju was the backbone of the family in upbringing up all of we siblings in my family. Let me narrate howThapa Daju came to our house and became an important member of our family. He was found on a railway platform by my grandmother and uncle on their way to Gelephu from Sibsoo. There was no direct bus to travel from Gelephu to Sibsoo those days. One had to take a train to Kokrajhar in Assam from Nagarkata in West Bengal. It was a win win situation for both Thapa Daju and us as we had no one to support the family after my elder sister got married and had to leave for her in-law’s house. Thapa Daju had no place live and at the same time we were in need of someone to support us. He was never taken as someone who was there to work for us but was a family member. He was with us for a long time before he left to work and earn for himself in 1990. We loved and miss him a lot. I met him once in Phuentsholing and he told me that he was taking care of cows of a Dasho somewhere in Kabretaar. After that I haven’t met him again. I am still looking for his whereabouts so that I could support him in a way during his old age as he has no one other than us. His name was Ram Bahadur Thapa.
The forest between Aie bridge and Thewar Khola that used to be our pasture land for our cattle got cleared for resettlement of the people from Tongsa and Shemgang in early eighties. Houses were built with proper water supply and toilets. Hundreds of people got resettlement in Shershong, Norbuling, Pemaling and Kingaling. Government opened a primary school near Shershong village in a bamboo hut near Aie Bridge and another in Norbuling above Phanphane. The private school where I was enrolled got shut down when a government school came up. I was in class 3 then but when I migrated to government primary school I was admitted in class 2. Although the walking distance to school was forty-five minutes, it was not at all a burden to walk those days. I remember getting WFP food for two meals in the school since then. I remember of Thueb (porridge) of a nutritious mixture of roasted flour for breakfast. Sometimes we used to be served with tea and other times knead and made into ball and served with tea. Lunch used to be of boiled SFB (wheat and soya ground into pieces which looked like Dalia) with potato curry and dry fish gifted by Norway in huge wooden boxes. I used to be a pure vegetarian until then but had no other options rather than to start eating and slowly developed the taste. I still remember getting all stationeries at school including a pen with a nib attached to a wooden holder. We used to get this holder and ink tablets for students above class II. Pencil was only for Upper KG, Lower KG and class I. We had to put a tablet in a small bottle and dip the nib to write. I remember collecting injection vials to carry ink from the nearby newly established Basic Health Unit. We had to dip the pen nib every after few alphabets written. Ink pen was affordable only by the wealthy ones in the higher grades. Later, during eighties came the refillable pens and the Chinese pens in abundance of different cost and quality in the shops.
After few years, the school was relocated on the hillock, near Thewar Khola which was just twenty minutes walk. I used to be liked by most of the teachers and they trusted me too. I was clever and sharp and good at studies. I remember being taught by Mr.Kesang Wangchuck, Head Master, from Tangsibji village in Trongsa, Mr. Kharel, a white haired gentleman, from Tsirang , Mr. D.B.Tamang from Dhajay in Tsirang and Mr. H.D.Saha from West Bengal. I used to be asked to stay with some of the teachers at school and I did that with many. I remember staying with Mr. Kharel, Mr. Shah during my primary schooling and even remember staying with teachers during my high school days when I was supposed to stay in hostel. I don't know what made me to do this.
I never feared to travel alone during my childhood. I remember travelling to Phuentsholing alone with a letter from my teacher Mr. Shah to the Education Store Officer Mr. Sarkar. Very smartly, I asked for the location of the person I had to stay with, located him and stayed with him there. It was a Bangali family working in Central Workshop whom I never met before. Stayed with the family for a week and got back to school on a truck, delivering the school stationeries from Education Store Phuentsholing. I was in Class IV then. I also remember taking up a challenge to take my mother from Gelephu to Sibsoo to meet her mother. I got mixed up with Gairkatta and Nagarkata. Instead of getting down in Nagarkata I got down in Gairkatta and landed in Samchi that evening. There was no means of transport from Samchi to Sibsoo then. It was already getting dark and had to look for a shelter there. When I looked for hotels there was none. I talked to someone in a small shop and I remember Mr. Pradhan, who owned the shop, had his house above the existing Shiv temple. He was kind enough to give us shelter that night. I don't remember what we ate that evening as I remember my mom wouldn’t eat anything. It was during the winter vacation after I passed Class VI.
After I completed my primary school I was placed to Trongsa Junior High School. I was lucky that Mr. Kesang Wangchuck, my headmaster too, got his transfer to Tshangkha PS near Tongsa. I accompanied him to my new school in Tongsa with him. I have had another experience away from home for the first time to rural central Bhutan. The experience was in Tshangkha village before I was escorted to my school. It was about the type of meal we were served with which I was not used to with. I had to adjust and survive with pancakes of bitter buckwheat and suja for some days. It was a different cross cultural exchange.
I was liked by everyone in the community since my childhood and I am still in touch with all the elder ones and ones of my age level although they are scattered around the world for better.. I was brave and forward from my childhood days. I remember influencing the neighbours for evening gathering to perform Bhajan-Kirtan (devotional choir). Even elderly people used to ask me to lead Deusi Bhailo which was very much popular those days. I used to read Sostani Katha and Ramayana from my childhood days and knew the epic well. This continued for as long as I was in my village before I left the locality for my further studies and work. Later, I came to know that the team bought a set of musical instruments and necessary items required by the community with the collection from the performance. I studied Nepali in my village private till Class III and a little bit in Class IV and V in Primary School. With that much of formal learning, I remember reading Swasthani to the family in the evening, as and when a month long Swasthani puja used to be performed. It used to take place during the winter vacations. Almost every house used to have Swasthani Puja and that used to be something everyone would get together in the evening with Bhajan Kirtan and dances after the tiring day. I too had visit houses with Naag on Naag Panchami and Kush on Kusay Ausie. Cash collection and money was not of that much value but the family and the community bond was. But still it use to be some pocket money for me. I cherish those beautiful memories.
A Bhajan Kirtan that I use to lead.
One of the most fascinating things that I remember today is
that I was the one who used to own a camera in the village for the first time.
I still have some pictures which might cost a thousand dollars if asked. Those
were the golden if not diamond memories of my childhood.
My father's share of land in Surey, sharing the border
with uncle, was only a small paddy field. I remember of having given that
land to my sister (Tekala Dahal) to cultivate as the land they owned was
not very suitable for growing rice. They got bifurcated from the family
members and had to live on their own. They were settled in upper Surey. It was
cultivated until the flood washed away everyone except me to a distant land. I can
still see that house upright where I was born which was my uncle's. This has
been sold off and someone else lives here. I even remember the Registration
number (Tharm No. 121) of the paddy field we owned in Surey. It was because I
remember paying the taxes a couple of times.
